ONE of the reasons I am so very passionate about coaching gentlemen is because of my father. Growing up, I could see and hear the stress he faced every day — juggling work as a college professor by day , then officiating basketball in the evenings, organizing weekend events for friends, herding two daughters to maintain our property of gardens, a Christmas tree business, and golf driving range. But, sometimes, I actually FELT the stress he carried around on his shoulders and in his head —meaning, his overworking, seeming obsession on making money, and constant focus OUTWARD with strangers (instead of INWARD towards his family)— weighed on me as a kid. Sure, he did what he could to be “present”, but the pressures he created and inherited with regards to his career, his past, his parents and his conscience made it very difficult to understand this man, let alone really feel like I had a relationship with him.
I have spent the past 16 years working my tail off to build a NEW relationship with Pop… but damn, it’s tough to pick up and toss what time has nailed to the floor.
My point is: I believe wholeheartedly that my father would be a different man —more grounded, less regretful, more connected to family, less fearful of the future— if he’d had some kind of coach in his corner. And, dare I say, a strong FEMALE, at that —who would have provided objective feedback, empathetic listening, unshakable accountability, strategic guidance, and unconditional encouragement. And who could have helped this man create a life that balanced career WITH family, and bloomed more open communication, confidence, joy, creativity, endurance, thankfulness, and love.
Having coached and advised men in business for over 17 years, any chance I earn to serve a client as his coach and wingman I take very seriously. For I know that I may be the very person who helps a man light up his own life before it’s too late.
Just as MAY is the month of women, to me… JUNE is the month of men. And I say that with absolute love, compassion, curiosity and appreciation. It’s become a recurring timeslot wherein I default to thinking about my relationships with the ‘important’ gents in my life… the most prominent and precious being the bond I have with my own pop — the man I love to pieces, even as he drives me crazy!
So, cheers to the Dads, the Uncles, the Dudes who aspire to wear those hats. Invest in yourself and perhaps this month may bring you a positive shift in perspective, in habits, in attitudes, and in resolution towards becoming the most awesome man you can be.
Never Stop EVOLVING.